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Why should Elin Nordegrin Woods stand by her man, Tiger Woods?

I am so fed up with the psycho-babble, social pundits analyzing why the wives of movie stars, professional athletes or politicians stay with their adulterous husbands.  “Oh, if it was not for the money and the prestige these women would not lower themselves to the shame of being cheated on.” on and on and on.

Well, let me tell you!  World, are you listening? 

They should stay with their husbands* because it is the right thing to do, the God thing to do.

Yeah, I’m from the Religious Right.  And, I have just as much right to tell these ladies what they ought to do as the feminist whiners of the liberal mass media.  Isn’t that what they are doing – telling them what they should do?

Specifically, Elin should stay committed to her marriage (and working on full-restoration) with Tiger Woods for the following reasons:

1.  The definition of love has everything to do with sacrifice and nothing to do with selfishness.  Love is patient, love is kind (and occasionally swings the husbands golf clubs – I couldn’t resist). It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered (but anger can arise sometimes at 2:30 am), it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.  I Corinthians 13:4-8a.  

2. In  his statement on Wednesday Tiger wrote, “Elin has always done more to support our family and shown more grace than anyone could possibly expect.”  Everyone of us on planet earth has received more mercy and grace from God our Creator, Lord, Sustainer, and Savior than we could ever hope to give to another.  I believe that it is that same type of mercy and grace that each of us are called to extend to others, especially those that we have committed to love (family).  Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.  Ephesians 5:1-2  Mercy:  God did not dole out the punishment each of us deserves for the things we have done.  Instead he sent his Son to take our punishment.  Grace:  God gives me the gifts and blessings that I could never earn, no matter how hard I try. God treats me as though I were his favorite son or daughter.

3. God hates divorce.  “I hate divorce,” says the Lord God of Israel,”  Malachi 2:16a  And the exception clause “except for marital unfaithfulness (fornication in some modern versions)”, is a modern-day mis-interpretation of God’s Holy Word.   While the other scriptures (Mar 10:11, 12; Luke 16:8; Romans 7:2,3; I Corinthian 7: 10, 39) are very clear on divorce and remarriage, many people find that Matthew 19:9 leaves them puzzled and uncertain as to what the Word of God teaches concerning divorce and remarriage.   Even though one would be hard pressed to find a modern English version of the Bible without it, the holy scripture never contained this exception clause until Desiderius Erasmus, a Renaissance humanist and a Catholic theologian created a Greek-Latin New Testament and added it.  Below is the before and after (English translations) of the Erasmus Latin translation:

• Latin Vulgate (English Translation): And I say to you that whosoever shall put away his wife, such as for fornication,and shall marry another, committeth adultery.
• Erasmus Latin NT in English: And I say to you that whosoever shall repudiate his wife, unless it be for disgrace, and shall marry another, committeth adultery.

So basically, he changed “such as for” to “unless it be for”  – a minor word change but a major change of interpretation.

Now let it be said, “God does NOT hate those who get divorced.  But, He does hate divorce and instructs strongly against it in his Word.

4. Hey people!  It’s time to make a stand and turn things around.  We can not expect to turn our countries social, economic, or political ills around if we cannot even do it in our families.  Suck it up – work for something worth keeping.  Set a standard for you kids, and grandkids.  In his statement, Tiger voiced this very sentiment, “I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves.”   He has voiced before how important his children are to him and that he wishes to be the same kind of father to his kids as his father was for him.  Yes, he blew it here – blew it big time.  But why add a broken family to the mix?

5.  Let’s see what Jesus says when actually asked “flat-out” whether it is okay for a man to divorce his wife. As Jesus was teaching the crowds in the region of Judea…

Some Pharisees came and tested him [Jesus] by asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” “What did Moses command you?” he replied. They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied. “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’  So they are no longer two, but one.  Therefore what God has joined together let man not separate.”  Mark 10:2-9 (underlined words are my personal emphasis) 

The most convincing portion of this Scripture set for me is Jesus’ reply regarding Moses’ permission to divorce. He said, “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses’ wrote this law.” The notes for this Scripture from my study Bible explain the phrase“…because your hearts were hard,” this way:  Divorce was an accommodation to human weakness and was used to bring order in a society that had disregarded God’s will, but it was not the standard God had originally intended as vv.6-9 clearly indicate.  The purpose of Deuteronomy 24:1 [Moses’ divorce permission law] was not to make divorce acceptable, but to reduce the hardship of its consequences. 

If this was true in Moses’ day, and Jesus’ day, it sure seems like it is an accurate description of today’s society as well. 

We could do a complex study on the causes and effects of a hard heart, which would fill a book of its own. Just from the sound of it and from the context of how Jesus uses it in these Scriptures, I believe we can deduce that a hard heart is not what God wants us to have.  I do find it interesting that it was not a hard heart toward their wives that Jesus was referring to, but a hardened heart to the things and ways of God.

Elin Nordgren Woods, I do not know how your relationship is with Jesus Christ, Lord and Savior.  But, do not harden your heart to God.  Choose God, choose love.

*Husbands, you also should stay with your wives if you find yourself in the same but opposite situation as Ms. Woods. 

For more information on divorce and remarriage, I recommend the following readings:

http://morechristlike.com/except-for-fornication-clause-of-matthew-19-9/

http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Articles/ByDate/1986/1488_Divorce_and_Remarriage_A_Position_Paper/

Steele, Paul E. and Ryrie, Charles C., Meant to Last, 1986, Victor Books.

Merrick, Robert A., Why Stand? A Resolve to Stand for Marriage Restoration, 2008, Xulon Press http://www.xulonpress.com/bookstore/bookdetail.php?PB_ISBN=9781606473009

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